Relationship Advice the Ancient Chinese Way

Article by Henry Fong

It is possible to review or get a glimpse of someone’s relation with their spouse during their lifetime by taking a look at the birth chart.

An experience Chinese astrologer can tell by accessing your spouse pillar in ba Zi or the spouse palace in Zi Wei Dou Shu. (Ba Zi and Zi Wei Dou Shu are popular systems of Chinese astrology).

It is fine if the chart shows a compatible, close and satisfying relation, but what if it shows a less than favorable spousal relationship? Are you doomed and condemn to a lifetime of spousal misery? The answer is no, at least not according to the ancient Chinese. Help is on the way.

Here is some practical advice from the ancient Chinese to improve your spousal relationship.

Marry or establish a relationship at the right time. Timing is important. If the chart indicate a probable divorce if you marry before the age of 28, then you should marry later to avoid this pre-destiny from manifesting.

Ensure there is a significant age difference. To the ancient Chinese, a poor pre-destined spousal relationship can be improved if we deviate from the norm. It is a norm for the man to be a few years older than the wife. Therefore to alter the spousal luck, a man should marry an older woman (at least a day older preferably much more) or a much younger wife (by at least 7 years preferably more).

Make sure that there is a significant difference in status. This is another variation of not following the norm. Ensure that there is a significant difference in status. For example if the man is highly educated, the wife should have a lowly education or if the wife is wealthy, the man should be poor!

Be the Second One. Unfavorable relationship luck implies that you will not be successful as the first wife or the legally recognized one. The ancient Chinese believe that you can have more success if you take up the role of the 2nd wife, mistress or one that is not legally recognized. But what can a man with poor spousal luck do? He can marry a widow or a divorcee!

Marry someone from a different culture. This is yet another variation of not following the norm. For example if you are Chinese, you can marry an Indian, Malay or a Caucasian person. To ensure a greater chance of success, he or she should not be from the same area. The further he or she is the better.

Reduce Proximity. A poor spousal relationship can be improve by spending less time together. For example the husband should work in another city or country and come back once in a while to visit. The ration is that since they spend relatively less time together, the chance of issues arising is dramatically reduced! Also absence should make the heart grown fonder.

There you have it. You see, all is not lost even if your spousal luck is poor!

www.nomadicsamuel.com The population of Malaysia is made up of many ethnic groups. Malays make up 50.4% of the population, with other bumiputra making up another 11%.[2] According to constitutional definition, Malays are Muslims who practice Malay customs (adat) and culture. They play a dominant role politically. Bumiputra status is also accorded to certain non-Malay indigenous peoples, including ethnic Thais, Khmers, Chams and the natives of Sabah and Sarawak. Non-Malay bumiputra make up more than half of Sarawak’s population and over two thirds of Sabah’s population.[2] There also exist aboriginal groups in much smaller numbers on the peninsula, where they are collectively known as Orang Asli.[142] Laws over who gets Bumiputra status vary between states.[143] Various other minorities who lack Bumiputra status have established themselves in Malaysia. 23.7% of the population are of Chinese descent, while those of Indian descent comprise 7.1% of the population.[2] The Chinese have historically been dominant in the business and commerce community, and form the majority of the population of Penang. Indians began migrating to Malaysia in the early 19th century.[144] The majority of the Indian community are Tamils.[145] Many Europeans and Middle Easterners assimilated through inter-marriage into the Christian and Muslim communities respectively. Most Eurasian Malaysians trace their ancestry to British, Dutch or Portuguese colonists. Citizenship is usually granted by lex soli
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Silat – Malay Art of Self Defence

Many Asian countries have each evolved their own system of martial arts, and Malaysia is no exception. Most Westerners are familiar with Karate, Judo, Tae-kwondo and Kung-fu thanks to action movies from Hollywood and Hong Kong. Yet there is also a graceful, yet deadly, martial art called Seni Silat that is deeply rooted in Malay culture. This art of self-defence is practised not only in Malaysia but also in Indonesia, Singapore, Brunei and in varying degrees even in the Philippines and Southern Thailand. In Indonesia, Silat is referred to as Pencak Silat, while in the Philippines it is called Kali Silat. The late Bruce Lee, Hong Kong’s martial arts legend and founder of Jeet Kwon-do, was also known to have been learning Silat to prepare for his next movie prior to his untimely demise.

The word Silat is coined from the term “Si Kilat”, meaning “one who moves like lightning.” However, the origins of Silat are hard to trace because of lack of written records; nevertheless, it is believed that Indonesia is its birthplace.

This martial art resulted from the observation of the fighting tactics of animals such as monkeys, tigers, eagles and cobras. Such movements were slowly built up into an elaborate system of self-defence. The turbulent history of the Malay Archipelago made fighting ability a much-valued asset; thus, silat spread far and wide throughout the region.

Archaeological finds indicated that formalised fighting systems had existed during the 6th century in the Malay Archipelago. Warriors from the ancient kingdoms of Srivijaya in Sumatra (4th to 7th century) and Majapahit (13th to 16th century) displayed effective Silat skills that enabled them to overrun what is now Indonesia, Malaysia and Singapore. According to Hisbullah Rahman in his book titled “History of the Development of Pencak Silat in Indonesia”, many Chinese went to Srivijaya’s University of Nalanda to learn both Silat and Buddhism. Early trade and migration from other countries also brought foreign influences to Silat. As a result, many Indonesian Pencak Silat systems feature Hindu weapons such as the trisula (forked truncheon), Indian grappling styles, Siamese costumes and Arabian weapons. Early migration by settlers from Indonesia fleeing from clan wars and, later, Dutch domination gradually swept Silat to the Malay peninsula.

Malaysia’s legendary Silat experts were Hang Tuah and Hang Jebat who lived during the reign of Sultan Mansur Shah (1459-1477) in Melaka. Today, though the Multimedia Super Corridor is paving the way for the IT era in the country, Silat is still alive and kicking. Both rural villages as well as cities have Silat schools. Silat performances are incorporated into wedding ceremonies, official functions and the performing arts. The national organisation for the promotion of Silat is the Persekutuan Silat Kebangsaan Malaysia (PESAKA) or The Malaysian National Silat Federation.

Silat has many styles, and they are named after the region of origin, an animal, its founder, a spiritual principle or a physical action. An estimated 200 styles are currently practised. Among the two most popular styles are Silat Seni Gayong and Silat Cekak. Silat Seni Gayong was founded by the late Dato’ Meor Abdul Rahman bin Uda Mohd Hashim (1915-1991). It has practitioners in the Middle East, America and Europe. A Bugis, Dato’ Meor was a direct descendant of Daeng Merewah, a famous silat expert from Sulawesi. Silat Cekak has is roots in Kedah, and was developed by the late Ustaz Haji Hanafi bin Haji Ahmad. During the reign of Sultan Ahmad Tajuddin (1854-1879), it was widely practised by his senior warriors. While many Silat Gayong moves are acrobatic, Silat Cekak techniques are mostly executed with a straight posture. A third school of Silat that also has a huge following in Malaysia is Silat Lincah.

Silat Gayong Fatani is infused with influences from Muay Thai or Thai kick-boxing. Silat Chikalong is based on the wing motions of a flying bat while Silat Harimau feature techniques similar to that of an attacking tiger. From Kelantan comes Silat Kelantan which is similar to Japanese judo as it incorporates a lot of throws and locks. In East Malaysia, Silat Betawi (named after Batavia, the Dutch name for Jakarta) has a strong following. This style is similar to Chinese Kun Tow (martial arts) and originated from Java. Silat Medan emphasizes weapon techniques, while Silat Setia Hati is named after a flower, which is beautiful yet deadly poisonous. Distinguishing the various styles of silat is not easy, and only experts can do so.

Irrespective of the style, silat consists of two dimensions: the pulut and the buah. Pulut is soft glutinous rice that is eaten at wedding receptions and gatherings. Therefore, Pulut simply refers to the aesthetically beautiful moves that are executed for entertainment purposes. Pulut is also referred to as Bunga (flower). On, the other hand, Buah, (which literally means Fruit) alludes to the practical aspects that are not displayed to the public. In actual combat, however, both the Bunga and Buah are combined with devastating effects. Bunga will distract and confuse the opponent with its graceful moves, which will suddenly change into explosive strikes at lighting speed -the Buah. In this strategy, the Flower leads to the Fruit.

The traditional attire of the silat exponent is a pair of loose pants and top. A sash completes the outfit. For exhibition purposes, a tengkolok is usually worn. Silat instructors are categorized according to the following levels: kang (lowest), guru, pendekar and mahaguru. In the olden days, finding a Silat instructor was extremely difficult as each teacher used different criteria in selecting students, though the prime consideration was always character and moral standard.

Training with weapons plays an important role in the advanced stage of silat. Depending on the curriculum of the school, a student is expected to master the following: kris (a short wavy dagger), pisau (a short knife), tali (rope), belantan (cudgel), pedang (sword), lawi ayam (a sickle), tongkat (a walking stick made of hardwood), tekpi (trisula), and badik (dagger with straight cutting edge and a back curving at the tip)..

Silat offensive moves are usually executed with the arm, knee, fist, elbow and legs. In addition, there may be a combination of claws, tear and pokes to the vital points. The Silat exponent practises with a combination of Juru-juru (or upper body manouevres) and Langkah (or footwork). The amount of emphasis on one or the other depends on the style and tactical approach.

Silat is not just a system of fighting techniques. There is also the spiritual and moral dimension that complements the blows, locks and kicks. Most Silat instructors in Malaysia are Muslim so their spiritual systems reflect the tenets of Islam. However, Silat transcends religion. In the Philippines, for example, Kali Silat incorporates Catholic ideals in its spiritual dimension, while in Bali, Hindu teachings are prevalent in its spiritual component. This religious aspect of Silat is aimed at personal development.

The future for Silat is exciting. Though, The Netherlands, by virtue of its historical association with Indonesia already has a strong following, Silat schools and interest groups are expanding in Japan, USA, France and the United Kingdom. The establishment of Pencak Silat Federation of the United Kingdom, Silat Federation of United Kingdom and Pencak Silat Bongkot of France are testimony of the growing popularity of this art of hand-to-hand combat.

For more details about the author, please visit his website at http://ewepaikleong.blogspot.com